Liberal Heart, Conservative Lips
by Ms. Babble on March 20, 2007
in Edumacation, Military, My Life in General
School’s started back up again. Spring break was much needed. It was a perfect opportunity to rejuvenate my brain cells. I must admit that it’s been slightly hard adjusting back to being a student. The shifting of focus in my head is what has been the hardest I think. I had to retrain myself to think like a student again and that hasn’t always been the easiest of tasks. But I certainly prefer being a student over being a soldier in Iraq any day.
A funny thing is happening to me these days though. On many occasions it’s been revealed during my classes that I’m a veteran. I recall in the past that I’ve never had any issues talking about my military experiences in class. In fact, I was slightly proud that I made it through basic training in one piece, was a good shot, and scored exceptionally high on their intelligence test.
But now when I’m “called out” in front of everyone, I turn red… start sweating… can’t help but look at the ground. What the hell is wrong with me? It’s as if I’m embarrassed to have the attention. As if this audience will smirk at me and judge the decision I made to enlist which ultimately put me in a war barely anyone agrees with. An extremely high percentage of college students condemn our presence in Iraq and I’m right smack in the middle of them.
Part of me wants to rejoin the ranks (I love puns) of their far left anti-war opinions. And I still think very leftist, to a point. But I think it takes a certain amount of ignorance to be so young and sure of themselves. I don’t think my school peers realize that some of us were forced to be sent out there. I don’t think a lot of them realize how liberal many veterans are.
I haven’t really proven this, of course. It’s all in my head. But I do think this logic is what’s making me embarrassed to talk about myself in front of them. I think revealing that I was sent to Iraq under baby Bush’s orders will make them form instant negative opinions of me. But the reality is that I’m just like them, I just had a bad break.
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Hmmm…Lot’s of thoughts brewing. Whereas EVERYONE has the right to his/her own opinions, I believe that no one has the right to JUDGE someone with a unique opinion or experience. i.e. I can take a strong stance against the war, but in isolation of everything else, would that make me a better person/a better citizen? Does that, by default, mean that I am well-educated? informed? civilized? more humane? Absolutely not!
On the flip-side, do all Soldiers/Military Leaders “believe in WAR”? NO! In fact, if they did, our government would not employ Medics nor Strategists, etc. Afterall, these roles are established to bring the violence and suffering to an end as quickly as possible. Do you see where I’m going with that?
J, this is quite a debate indeed, but certainly one worth contributing to, ESPECIALLY in your case, where your belief system is NOT what landed you in Iraq. Further, what more qualified person to open the eyes of peers, than someone who has experienced “WAR”, not only by definition, but also in the form of a very personal psychological and spiritual internal struggle whereby the your own morals and beliefs were on opposing sides of the battle? No one I can think of…
Remember, people will believe whatever they want to. And since this is based on information, they cannot be expected to see your side unless you are willing to share your knowledge/experience with them. Afterall, as teachers (a role belonging to every single one of us), our only job is to inform. Not to make our [students] believe what we ourselves believe, but more importantly, to give them more information on which to base their own opinions and beliefs.
That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it. Indeed, I realize that everything I have shared is arguable, but it is my truth, and I chose to put it out there. I feel that we owe that to one another(in the BIG picture.)
Peace, Djulie
um. i was going to respond. but anything i write is automatically going to be trumped by Julies essay. just saying.
I think it was a compliment.
Just be proud of who and what you are the rest is all white noise.
What Craig said, sister.
Peace
OUT.
I know somewhat how you feel. I’m a liberal homeschooling mom. My brother is in the miltary and I often get that “shouldn’t you be a conservative look” or “speech” a lot. Just keep being proud of who you are.
From my understanding the military is a volunteer military. No one forces you to go. You have signed a contract with military and like any business you either honor your end of the contract or face consequences.
I don’t like alot of things going on with the military, nor the limited benefits when we have troops in harms way, or after they get out.
I spent 8 years in the Army and was fully aware that in joining the military I could at any time be sent into war, into another country, into a peace keeping mission, or even support for other missions. It is the military JOB, that is the purpose behind a military is to protect, serve, defend, fight and while I may not have liked some of the presidents during the time I was in, I still follow the orders they give because they are the CinC of all the military – and that is our job, to go where they tell us.
Do I like it? No, I spent time in Panama, Korea and several duty stations in the states – but I was always fully aware that in joining the military I have limited freedoms and can be deployed wherever the president thinks we need to be. It isn’t my job to second guess generals, intelligence intel, ect…it is my job to do the best I can in the circumstances I find myself in.
You’re right, Sanity. We sign that military contract knowing full well we could be sent into a war overseas.
But that doesn’t mean we have to believe it’s a “good” war. Nor do we have to feel like we have done the right thing only because we followed the order to go.
I’m just trying to come to terms with my guilt of being a part of a war that I never believed in.
You make a good point, but it isn’t really what I’m saying in this post.
Thank you for your service. You’re one of the few that took the responsibility in protecting our nation.
I’ve been in kind’ve the opposite position. Having returned home and taking a job training soldiers on their ways overseas, you already know how I feel about the war, but due to my position I find myself biting my tounge not so much for myself, but because, somehow, despite everything, there’s still more than enough people on their way over there who believe whole heartedly in everything that’s being done in regards to iraq. I dunno.
I agree with what you said in one of your comments that you don’t necessarily have to agree with the purpose of the war. It’s a soldier’s duty to go wherever he/she is asked to go and fight the battle that they were ordered to do.
I also think that you shouldn’t feel that guilty—although I know it’s kind of hard, but as long as you are willing to grow and be better, and let goodness reign in your decisions and your reality, I think people will see that.
More power!
Cheers!